Friday, November 9, 2007

Buddy and the Enchanted Hose

Men and their penises. Why, oh WHY did God give them their own toys to take with them wherever they go?

Women do not play with their breasts just to have something to do with their hands. What it is about guys?

Buddy prefers to be naked. I encourage clothing choices, he prefers clothing optional. During one of his au naturel moments, he wanders into my office.

"Hey mommy! Check this out, see what I can do!"

He grabs his penis. Then he pulled the skin over the tip and pinched "First you cover it up, and then you push it in"


"And then you let go and *pop* it jumps back out!" He giggles like a maniac, and proceeds to do this horrible thing three or four more times.

Now, I can handle poop, pee, blood and major surgery. I cannot handle this.

WWWWHHHYYYYYYYY would anyone want to do this? What is the thrill? What is the purpose?

Then today, he tells me how he's going to eat and eat and eat and eat until his butt is "this big" (arms stretched out wide)

Why are you going to do that,my son?

He smiles at me, "because then I can poooooooooop a big pooooooop," his hands come together in front of his chest, as if he's cradling a glass ball " and then it will get small and I'll have the perfect butt, right there"

The perfect butt with the Enchanted disappearing hose. The kid is destined for Disney.

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