Sunday, February 3, 2008

Don't wanna work, can't make me

Working from home is a curse. Yes it has it's blessings, but mainly, it's frustrating. I don't even want to start working. So there, you benefit.

Super G's car wouldn't start yesterday. Major bummer. So it got towed away to a dealership. I suppose on Monday we'll discover how much our auto-rape will damage us. Serves us right for sending in that last payment.

So we are down to my car, the hulking MiniVan of Death. With all of her 197,000 miles on it. It's a Chevy too, isn't that scary, depending on a high mileage Chevy as your sole means of transport? I like to live dangerously though, and the thrilling invigoration of knowing that each drive out could be my last is such a's almost like drugs.

Actually, I saw an article about a guy who is about to roll over 1 million miles on his Chevy Silverado, and now I have a mission.

Two weeks ago when the dealer suggested that I just park my lovely van in the lawn and declare it a piece of art, as opposed to fixing it's ills, I began searching for the next Hulking MiniVan of Death. I mean, the current HMVofD was paid off last year, and on the day I got the death sentence from the nice guys at Bobb Chevrolet we had just mailed off the last payment on Super G's ride, so we were car payment free. As any red blooded American knows, this is just one step from carrying your Pinko-Commie membership card!

But now, I have a mission, a goal. HMVofD must make it to 1 million miles. She must. I'd like to get her window fixed, so I don't have to pull it up with my hands anymore, and probably that thing about the wheel mounts and tie rod would suck to be driving along and suddenly lose a wheel. And the catalytic converter......unless someone can tell me how you can just rip that thing off....I mean really, I'm an evil Rethuglican, we don't care about pollution or the environment, right? Emit away, dear HMVofD, chug out that Carbon Monoxide, to hell with the ozone layer, you know that we're colonizing on the moon anyway......

okay, the kids have fed their breakfast to the dogs, guess it is time to get busy......


GoHskrs said...

You're killing me with this HMVofD thing. You do know that, don't you?

Amy said...

Why? A million miles on a Chevy Venture? We'll make it onto "Unsolved Mysteries"!